11.05.2009

Brings You To Your Knees

"She got the call today, one out of the gray. And when the smoke cleared it took her breath away. She said she didn't believe, it could happen to me. I guess we are all one phone call away from our knees. "

Constantly throughout my life I had always said I just wish I could see the end picture. Who will I marry? What will my kids look like? Will I live a life that is pleasing to the Lord? Throughout the past year though I realize why God doesn't let us see the end result. This is life.

Life.

I think I have grown up more in this past year, then years combined. Amazing how, in order to grow up, you must get down on your knees. I have been brought to my knees so many times this past year. I have been broken in every since of the word: physically, mentally, spiritually.
Broken.

Broken so that God could rebuild me. I wouldn't take it back. The pain, the endless tears, the suffering. Everything is worth this. This complete joy. This peace.

Peace.

Peace that no matter what, my Savior has my best interest at heart. Peace that while trials will come again, I will never face them alone. Peace that who I am is just enough.

Just enough.

I am just enough. My faults, my failures, my insecurities. God made me this way. And He thinks its beautiful. A beautiful love. A beautiful life. This is what I want.

Beauty.

Perfect beauty that only comes from complete devotion to the creator of all things good, and holy, and wonderful. Beauty isn't a curse, it breaks my heart that so many girls live this way. As women, we were meant to be beautiful. Completely breathtaking. Eve was breathtaking. We were created in His image. Of course we are supposed to be beautiful! How fitting is it then, that just as Eve was banished from the most beautiful place in the world, our beauty is what brings us the most heart ache. We try to cover it, try to use it to persuade, ache over it, want it, compare it. The list goes on.

This isn't what God intended.

Who you are is just enough. Just enough. Enough.

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