1.24.2010

Soul Mates

I did something today that I haven't done in several years. I watched The Notebook. I guess I was just feeling in a sappy mood, and since it was Sunday, I figured why not watch a good chick flick. It made me start thinking about why so many girls love the storyline of the notebook. After all, it has some not so great parts--sex way too young outside of marriage, a terrible breakup, affairs--but it's the love story that gets us. The fact that after all those years, even after Allie had moved away and found someone new, Noah still waited for her. I think every girl secretly hopes that there is some guy out there waiting on her. That, while we are chasing our dreams, a guy is there knowing that one day we will come to our senses and fall into his arms. It's the idea, that we are worth waiting on. That once you meet us, no one else will do. We are so perfectly unique and created for only one person. And that person, amazingly enough, has the patience to wait. And wait. And wait. Because sometimes, girls can be so stubborn.

I also started thinking about something else. I once thought I knew exactly what love is. Now though, I'm happy to say that I don't. I have no clue what love is. I can't imagine what love must feel like after 50 years of marriage. I can't imagine what it would feel like to not have to worry, to be completely safe. To trust completely. To know, that I could always pursue my dreams because my drive and passion won't be a deterring factor to him. Once, I didn't believe in soul mates. I believed that anyone, if they were compatible could marry and be happy if they worked at it. I still believe that is true, but I believe God has a specific person in mind for each of us. I believe that when God created me, he had someone in mind for me. Not to complete me, but to compliment me. So that he could lead me and I could encourage him. I've always heard a lot of married couples talk about how everything they lacked their partner had. I think it goes much deeper than just the whole spender/saver, clean/messy ideas. I think it's so much more than that. I believe that my struggles won't be my husbands struggles. His strengths will be my weaknesses. When I'm unsure, he'll be confident. I think only God could pair that together. I don't think that I'll have some miraculous sign when I'm with the man that is my soul mate, but I believe I will hear soft words of affirmation all along the way.

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