9.02.2009

Everything Rides on Hope Now

If anyone knows me, they know that I am a total planner and control freak. I have had my whole life planned from the time I was 5 years old, and anytime those plans change, it really rocks my world.
I am very resistantly learning that God wants me to learn to depend on Him for my future. Wow, such a hard concept for me. Looking back on it, I am realizing that for the past year He has been trying to grab the reins out of my hands. I have held on tightly though! So He allowed my leg to be broken. Did I use that as a learning lesson? Nope. I kept right on my own path after my own plans.
Lately God has brought some incredibly difficult circumstances in my life. Let me tell you, I am STILL trying to control God. I try to put Him in a box and take Him out when I feel like it. This is not want God desires from us.
As of today, I have decided to attempt to put my life completely in my Savior's hands. Don't ask me my future plans because I have no idea what they are. Maybe, I'll go to graduate school. Maybe not. Maybe I'll become a teacher. Maybe not. Maybe I'll go to China. Who's knows! It's so thrilling, yet unbelievably scary at the same time. I can take great comfort in knowing that God really does have my BEST interest at heart.

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